Dear Abby
John Prine
	
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Dear Abby, Dear Abby, My feet are too long
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My hair's falling out and my rights are all wrong
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My friends they all tell me I have no friends at all
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Won't you write me a letter or give me a call
C   D    G
Signed - Bewildered

CHORUS:
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Bewildered, bewildered, you have no complaints
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You are what you are and you ain't what you ain't
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So listen up buster and listen up good
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Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood
C   D         G
Signed - Dear Abby

Dear Abby, Dear Abby, My fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
If it weren't so expensive, I'd wish I were dead
Signed - Unhappy

REPEAT CHORUS w/ Unhappy

Dear Abby, Dear Abby, You won't believe this
But my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss
My girlfriend tells me it's all in my head
But my stomach tells me to write you instead
Signed - Noisemaker

REPEAT CHORUS w/ Noisemaker
 
Dear Abby, Dear Abby, I never thought
That my girlfriend and I would ever get caught
Just sitting in the back seat shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed - Just Married

REPEAT CHORUS w/ Just Married